Monday, February 9, 2009

Finding Perfection

One thing that I've always struggled with is striving for perfection. Whether it is school, work, or personal relationships, I feel like things should be ideal and I usually beat myself up when I screw up or they don't go as planned.
The worst part is my relationship with Matt. Up until this past year, I've struggled with things not going just perfectly. I imagined a fairy tale romance and was often disappointed when I was let down. It's taken much work and a great amount of praying, but I've finally realized that there is no such thing as perfect. Every couple argues and has disagreements. We certainly have our fair share of arguments but we've grown and can have a discussion instead of a knock-down drag-out fight. We can spend time explaining our feelings and trying to understand eachother instead of being angry and holding a grudge. Even when things don't end up my way, I always feel much better after we've discussed our disagreements.
I think that it's important to realize that everything won't always be pleasant, but as long as the good times outnumber the bad, it's all worth it. It's always refreshing to hear about other women's lives and to know that I'm not the only one who doesn't have a perfect fairy tale life.
I will always be a work in progress and still have my immature outbursts but I'm realizing that "life can be 'perfect' even though things don't go perfectly".
I know this post isn't too cheery but it's just something that's been on my mind



. Becca . said...

I think about this a LOT too. You're not alone, at all!

Beauty is in the imperfections, in my opinion. That's what we remember the most, and look back and (hopefully) laugh at.

Mamarazzi said...

i think it is good to reflect and examine a relationship. not to dwell on what's not working but to take a look and see what NEEDS to be fixed and what is something you just need to accept about the other person. i have most def learned this: what you pay attention to grows! so focus on the stuff going right and more things will go right.

and you are right, life can be perfect even when everything isn't going perfectly.

Honey said...

it's a hard thing to realize, that your relationship (really, no relationship) is perfect. i struggle with the same issues, even more so being married forever, yikes. but as long as we can work through a problem, and have the drive to do just that, we're imperfectly perfect. hang in there. it keeps getting better.

Jon and Steph said...

Thanks for sharing this post! I know that everyone struggles with this, no relationship is perfect and it's great that you were able to talk about and let it out!
I am having to work extra hard right now in my marriage, because I am struggling with the SEVERAL changes that have come our way....
But Honey is right, hang in there, pray everyday and things will keep getting better!

Allison said...

Right there with you girl! I think that it is hard sometimes to read blogs because it SEEMS like everyone else is living this perfect life with their perfect marriage/relationship, etc...

But you know people aren't going to post about their fights or arguments... people don't usually share the bad stuff. I know I try to keep it to myself, at least :)

Fairy tales are just that...FAIRY TALES :) Real life takes real work :) The fact that you are realizing that at the age of 21 will set you up for greater success down the road!! :)

New Girl on Post said...

Well, as you know my relationship with Sean is far from perfect, but in reality, who's relationship is perfect?

We all have our fights, our arguements our bad times, but that's what makes a stronger couple.

I think you and Matt are doing just fine!

I love you Miss Kebi!

P.S. No internet at the house yet, I'm guessing it's going to be about a month.

Abbie said...

Oh girl, I SO hear you! I'm the same way too...I want my clothes, hair and makeup to be perfect. I'm always in a panic that my house isn't perfectly clean and most of all I always wanted the perfect marriage. But THANKFULLY life doesn't happen that way. It's the bumps and roadblocks that strengthen us and make us realize that imperfection isn't so bad;)

Thanks for commenting on my recent was definitely one of those days!

d.a.r. said...

Oh I hear ya. I am the EXACT same way! Sometimes I think I am my worst enemy! You are not alone.